Oh Christmas Tree

We talked Daddy into getting the tree out Tuesday night. I'm not sure if it's because you guys have never had a "real" tree, but it doesn't seem to bother you a bit that your tree comes from the attic. It certainly does not bother me that this is the tenth Christmas season this tree has graced our home. I love a good investment. Hah!

When you were little, every tractor, cow, ball, puppy, playground, etc. would elicit squeals of delight from you. These days it takes a little more to get those kinds of reaction. So, your excitement as we pulled out decorations made my heart full. 

I love how many of our decorations are homemade. Or, should I say, school made. 'Cause whatever other things your mama does well, crafting is not one of them. Your ornaments make me happy, nonetheless, especially the ones with your sweet faces on them.

 Luke, I know you don't find this amusing, but it never, ever fails to get a giggle out of me. I mean, which one of your teachers decided to use the picture of you with your finger in your nose? Now that's funny! I don't care who you are.

A Change In Focus

When I first began blogging, it was an outlet, a way to connect, a way to document "the moments", and it was just fun. We had a little blogging community, several of us moms with toddlers and preschoolers. I would write, knowing that my friends in the same stage of life would be writing and reading along with me. Our kids have gotten a little older, our lives a little busier, and blogging has tapered off. I miss it, that feeling of being connected with those not close enough to share a play date. I also know it is just the natural progression of life.

I feel I need to shift the focus of my blog slightly. Anyone reading along (anyone???) may not notice the difference. In my mind, my audience to this point, has been outward - those out there reading. These days, I find myself wanting to keep track of the memories of our days so my children will know how present I am for every moment of their lives. I'm in this thing, kids. I'm not wishing away your days. I'm feeling and enjoying and remembering and aching for this very moment. I'm here. One hundred percent of me. Do I some times lose my cool and act like it's all too much? Yep. Because, sometimes, it feels very much like too much. But that moment passes, and I'm back on track, and I'm right where I want to be more than anywhere else in the world.  I'm giving you all of me. I hope when you look back on your childhood you feel that completely.

But just in case you don't...I write. And it's for you, Luke. You, Eli. You, Judah. You, Susanna. When you've outgrown my lap, you can look back here and know that I counted every single one of your childhood days as my treasure.