Thursday, August 23, 2012

School Time

I'm sure most moms who blog have already put up pictures of their children's first day of school.  I saw plenty of them on Facebook.  We took pictures of Luke and Eli's first days, but I'm not sure they're post worthy.  Luke's are good, but Eli is turned away from the camera so you won't see where he's been crying.

Can you hear the sound of my little heart breaking?

I know it will work itself out.  I know he'll adjust.  I know it just takes time.  But right now, I'm trying to hide my tears too.  For whatever reason, ones I will probably only be able to put into words a few years down the road, I feel this need to protect and mother Eli far more than I do Luke or Judah.  Maybe because he is less independent, even though he's growing every day.  Maybe it's because he really just wants to be with his mama and daddy, and I love that so much.  Maybe because I remember being the same way.

Whatever the reason, I so needed this devotional this morning from my devotional book, Jesus Calling. (By the way, this is the best five minute devotional I've ever had.  It nails the very thing going on in my life on a daily basis.  It's almost like the author, or maybe God, is stalking me.  I love it!)

"Entrust your loved ones to Me; release them into My protective care.  They are much safer with Me than in your clinging hands. (I told you - STALKING!)  If you let a loved one become an idol in your heart, you endanger that one - as well as yourself.  Remember the extreme measures I used with Abraham and Isaac.  I took Isaac to the very point of death to free Abraham from son-worship.  Both Abraham and Isaac suffered terribly because of the father's undisciplined emotions.  I detest idolatry, even in the form of parental love.
   When you release loved ones to Me, you are free to cling to My hand.  As you entrust others into My care, I am free to shower blessings on them.  My Presence will go with them wherever they go, and I will give them rest.  This same Presence stays with you, as you relax and place your trust in Me.  Watch to see what I will do."
Jesus Calling
August 23rd

UPDATE: When I picked the boys up today, I asked them how the day went.  Eli said, "Good!  It was fun!"  And then he remembered that he wasn't supposed to like school and quickly said, with a little smile, "Oh, I mean, it was boring."

1 comment:

Lauren said...

that speaks right to me too. maybe i need to do that devotional too. i struggle with that every day as i do not always get to see or talk to taylor each day. it breaks my heart, but all i can do is trust in god. thank you for sharing.

and by the way - that was so cute what eli said about how school was boring. what a funny guy! :)